It’s because they don’t use the right words. Well, they might be the right words for you, but are they the right words that the other person needs to her?
Language sets the tone for respect, kindness, safety, belonging, mattering and more. And it can do the opposite too.
Language helps us understand what another person is experiencing, how to support them, how to honor them. And it can do the opposite too.
As a Leadership and Culture Coach, I frequently help clients use the most effective words to get the result they want with others. My father was skilled at human relations, and I found the below “course” digging through my late father’s belongings.
Here’s the shortest course you’re likely to ever find in Human Relations.
The least most important word: “I”
The 1 most important word: “We”
The 2 most important words: “Thank you.”
The 3 most important words: “If you please.”
The 4 most important words: “What is your opinion?”
The 5 most important words: “You did a great job!”
The 6 most important words: “I admit I made a mistake.”
What are other important words/phrases you use?
One of mine is “together”. It’s a powerful word that helps the recipient know they are safe, they belong, they matter.
“We’ll figure this out together.”
“Together our team will innovate like never before.”
“We can crush the competition together.”
You get the idea.
When you start to notice the power of words you start to speak differently. Because you now know that language can either boost confidence or bash it, align/enroll/engage teams or tear them apart, create utter devotion and loyalty or cause people to run screaming.
How would you like to tune up your communication skills today?
Christine Comaford is a leadership and culture coach who helps businesses achieve growth. Learn more at SmartTribes Institute and see Power Your Tribe: Create Resilient Teams in Turbulent Times and SmartTribes: How Teams Become Brilliant Together.