Newscast – Your FEARS are Illusions Too — PART TWOAugust 11, 2009
If you’re like a lot of entrepreneurs, you’ve already worked your rear end off building your business. You’ve discerned your needle movers, built a rockin’ team and you’re ready to MOVE! So what’s stopping you? Well, if you’re like most of us, fear raises its ugly head just when the fun starts. But here’s the good news: like your limiting beliefs, your fears are ALSO only illusions. And THAT means you can release them and create new ones. (Did she say, “New fears?”) Sure I did — some fear is good. Fear that are centered on survival are essential. Fear that is motivating helps us keep going on the tough days. For the most part, however, our fears are just a kind of illusion – and not even a special kind. When I work with entrepreneurs and intrapreneurs, I find we share a lot of common fears.
So, how can you banish them? Since fear is mostly about ignorance, the best part is that it’s as temporary as you choose. I used to make “fear lists” and tackle one a month, reviewing the lists at least twice a year to see if I’d successfully banished the demons. Now I just tackle my fears in real-time, as they appear from the mist (or toss up a brick wall – whichever the case may be). Some of my past fears included attending events where I felt inadequate (not important enough) and feeling ignorant about socializing with super-powerful people. My palms would get ice cold and clammy, and my posture would be “small” and a little hunched. It was clear I didn’t feel that I fit into their league. I wanted to play at this level of society, but like a lot of people, I was scared.
Shortly after I decided to nail this fear, one of my mentors invited me to a dinner party in New York. I was seated at a table with Connie Chung, Maury Povich, and several other famous and powerful people. I had to shake a ton of hands and make small talk for 90 minutes when I had no idea what these people were interested in. I adopted an illusion that I too was a player, powerful and famous, and willed my palms to be dry and warm. I asked a lot of questions. I was confident. And the result was that now I can meet anyone, speak before any size of crowd, and hold my own.
So how do you do that for yourself? How do you challenge a limiting (or worse, a deal-breaking fear)?
Try this: Identify that inner critic, that fear monger, inside your head. Draw a picture of her or him and write down what she or he says. Mine is quite the blabbermouth: Stop making so many mistakes, Christine! You’re fat, work out more! You’re not making a big enough contribution to the world—work harder, do more, give more! You’re a fraud—you’re not as smart or accomplished as you think you are! … Maybe your inner critic is a schoolmarm, an icky blob monster, or a dominatrix. Name yours, if you want. My friend, comedienne Terri Tate, calls hers “That Vile B—– Upstairs.” Later, when you hear the fear monger shrieking, say, “Thanks for sharing. Please take a: Vacation / Chill pill / Nap.”
That’s it for now gang. I’ll share some more on this during the week, so stay tuned.
Christine Comaford, CEO Freedom Fighter!
CEO of Mighty Ventures, Inc.
NY Times Best Selling Author
PS: If you’re REALLY ready to release ALL of your fears (at least the kind that roadblock your business), then consider making the BEST business investment out there and take my Results Now Webinar course. I put it together to be the 1-2-3 to success kit for entrepreneurs and small business builders. I also look forward to seeing some of you at my next CEO FREEDOM SUMMIT in September, but until then, this is best head start / fear buster out there.